Be Considerate

When my second IUI failed, I remember how down I was. I confided to my mom, someone who I always turned to for advice. I told her how these several years battling with infertility has been so damn hard and makes me feel lost. 

I told her how I felt like I have no purpose in life. At that time I have quit my six years job (which I love very much). I confided in her how it was not easy being from someone so productive with her life to being someone who stays home and hang on to uncertainty hope.

My mom is a hardworking woman since she was young, she and my dad have their own business so she always encourage me how important it is to have my own business or source of income. My parents also didn’t 100% agree when I decided to quit my job, so she could easily use that moment to lecture me. But that day she knows exactly what I need to hear instead of what she probably wanted to say. Instead of saying things that she thinks was best for me, she comforted me in the way that she knew I needed.

She replied me, "Don't you worry dear. By the time you have that child of yours, and I know you will, you will be as happy and as busy as you always dream of. That lost feeling you've been having will change to contentment". 

I have always love my mom for whoever she is, but that day, I love her even more. 

I think what I'm trying to emphasize is, when we talk, we often didn't put ourselves in other shoes and mostly say whatever we want to without thinking what the person might feel. It's hard enough to go through life without being criticized, so please always be kind and considerate. Or remember this; if you don't have anything nice to say, be quiet is always the safest option. 

Until next thoughts, 

Ivy

Burger King and Mcdonald’s

Hubs and I have different characters. 

I'm a pessimist, he's an optimist.

I'm introvert, he's ambivert. 

Occasional solitude is important for me, not to him. 

I like to try new places, while he is loyal to his favorites. 

I love books, he hates reading.

And these are just half of them... 

We are different, but we do our best to make it work.

We respect our differences, because we understand everyone is born different.

Don't force people to change into someone they're not. If one day they decided to change, let it be on their own terms, for their own benefit, not yours.  

I always believe that mutual understanding is the basic foundation in any kind of relationships. 

Shall we all learn to be more like Burger King and McDonald's? After all, they are our favorite junk food. ;)

Until next thoughts, 

Ivy 

Why I Think It's Important To Listen To Your Inner Voice

The reason why I am a believer in listening to our inner voice starts from this chapter of my life...

It was 2005. Couple months after I graduated from college, I was still jobless. I majored in Accounting, yet I suck at numbers. Well, probably not suck, but the idea of working in a field relating to numbers has never been my interest. So, why choose accounting, you were wondering? I’m not sure, I was 17 when I graduated from high school, not really know what my interest are, at that time, Accounting seems to be a safe choice. Something that I regretted now, because dear... Always find something you passionate in. 

Ivy's Thoughts: After 5 Years

Hello Everyone! Happy new year 2016! Is it too late to ask how's everyone's new year? It's been 11 days but I still find it hard to believe that it's 2016 already. In blink of an eye, here comes Chinese new year. Time flies. 

I'm sorry for the quite long hiatus I've been taking. It was literally the longest blogging-less I've ever done. I was planning to just write a new post without some explanations on the hiatus part, but I decided to write one on reasons behind my absence, not that anyone care. :D

So, if you kind enough to pay attention, I'm not only taking some time off from blogging, but also food hunting. For the past few months, I did cut back on my crazy food hunts. I no longer immediately go to any new restaurants who just open like I used to do. That explains how my social media, instagram to be exact was lack of posts in these past couple months (except during my recent HK's trip).

Okay, it's getting personal. 

After 5 years of marriage, Hubs and I, we decided that it's time to be really serious on planning a family. Since we got married, we never postpone on having a baby, we love kids and never not want one, unfortunately, our journey on having one is not as smooth as other lucky couples. From taking it easy to serious, to on and off doctors' appointments, until at some point, we or to be exact, me, just had the kind of phase that probably every women who's trying to have a baby once had. I stopped trying. Disappointment sucks and sometimes does reality and I stayed at that phase for quite some time, shifting my focus to something "funner". I blogged, I write, I go crazy on restaurant hunting, anything that makes me happy suits me at that time.

It went on for I think couple of years before I realized that I've been focusing on some things that makes me happy temporarily rather than what I really want in life. Everyone wants different things in life, but mine has always is, to have a family. That's all that matters to me but the past disappointments had let me to kinda run away from it.

I love social media, but I'm so glad that I came to realization that getting some time away from it, is actually a good thing. I used to be constantly checking my phone, but now I limit my self to only check instagram couple times in a day. I often leave my camera at home while I go out to eat, something which I never did before. Oh, but I do have Snapchat now. I feel it's the right social media for me at the moment as with snapchat, I can snap casually, not like instagram which need to use a good camera and right angle to get that instagram worthy shot.

For the past few months, we had been on track on getting our purpose refocused. Unlike before, Hubs and I are in committed program with our doctor, no more on off treatments. From that too, we found out that I have Toxoplasmosis history. It's a parasitic disease where adult people are getting infected from pets or raw food. I don't have pets, nor like to be near any cats or dogs, so mine was 100% infected from raw food. I do eat sashimi probably more than normal people who are not Japanese. I love sashimi, I love caesar salad, and I never did know that I have low body immune that got me infected to it. I was on therapy for 3 months and thankfully now I'm Toxo-free but our doctor strictly still forbid me from having any uncooked food until I'm pregnant and gave birth. We were also been advised to not consume too many seafood (besides fish), no junk food (bye bye KFC), and nothing with preservatives like instant noodles, canned or frozen food.

That's why I have been limiting my self to my food hunting hobby and more on clean eating right now. I do miss it sometimes, but this is important for me, for us. On whether I'll be pregnant or not, besides Him, who would know? But at least I know that we are giving our very best on pursuing it.

I'm not saying that I'll stop blogging or posting on my Instagram, it just wont be as intense as previously. I'm not going to be like immediately go to any new restaurants in town like I used to do, probably more selective on choosing which one to visit or not to.

Another thing is, being blogging absence for a while and getting back on it today makes me reminded that blogging is really not as easy as what some people might think. You need commitment, and an amount of time to do the writing and photo editing. It's a privilege knowing that some of you spent time to visit and read my babbling. So, really, I mean it, from the bottom of my heart, when I write, thank you for reading at the end of all my posts, I really really really mean it. Thank you for reading!

-Life is about options. You win some, you lose some.-

Until next thoughts,

Ivy

Ivy's Thoughts: Being Positive Is A Good Thing

It was several morning ago when I was on my way to meet my Mom and I wanted to buy some breakfast first, so I drove to Muara Karang. I was not really feeling well those couple days from the cold and fever, but I was strong enough to drive alone. I hate passing by Muara Karang main street during morning time as it can be a total bitch due to all those cars parked for the traditional market. 

I admit, it's not a good example but I am one of those texting while driving kind of gal, but I didn't even touch my phone that day and somehow I bumped into that car. I don't know how on earth that I didn't see it. 

I'm a religious and I pray every single day (though yes, I'm a human and sometimes I do forget), but that morning I did not forget. I could do all the blaming on how prayers are useless as it didn't save me from having an accident and all, but instead I looked it from a positive side. I was blessed. I was fortunate that it was only a minor accident, I was fortunate that I wasn't hurt and I was fortunate that the owner of the car that I crashed into wasn't an asshole who got mad like some crazy people, instead he was kind and easy to talk to. 

And bless Hubs for having such kind heart that from the moment I rang him the news, all he did was making sure I'm okay and told me to not panic nor worry, that he would handle everything. 

Don't get me wrong, I am not a positive person. I tend to look everything from the negative side, but that day I chose to look from the bright side. I regretted that I was not being careful but things could be worse so I'm glad I was blessed. 

Though you know what, the car I ran into was Range Rover and I simply can't help to think, of all cars, why on earth did I have to crash into a Range Rover?! Europe cars are not cheap to fix! *aching* 

Moral of the sharing:

1. Always always 100% focus while driving.

2. Don't ever forget to pray.

3. Be kind. If someone accidentally hit your car, be considerate, it's not like they do it on purpose.

4. Try to (although sometimes uneasy) see things from positive side, it's healthier. :)

Until next thoughts, thank you for reading! 

Ivy 

Ivy's Thought: Sometimes Change Is Good

 

I admit, I don't like changes. It scares me. I like everything just the way as it always be. I'm so scare of changes that I avoided it even when I know it was a good kind of change.

Ivy's Thought: Inspiration In Need

Many people who don't really know me always thought that my fond of food is what brings this blog to life. It's not entirely wrong as I do love food and I loveeee to eat. Food has always been one of my biggest weaknesses.

February

I have been a bit slow on the posting lately. Having busy as the reason would be a complete lie, the truth is I was lazy, uninspired and didn't really feel like writing. It's funny as I always love to write.

So, this month is my birth month. When you're in your 30s, honestly birthday is something you no longer looking forward to as it means you're getting another year older. It's crazy to think how I am in my 30s, seriously I still feel and breath like I was 22 and yet I'm not. 

If you are that person who loves to make list of what to do before you're 30, 40 or 50, really put them into action and not just a beautiful list, coz honey, time flies!

Anyway, I posted along some treats we had on my birthday. Since I got married, We have a birthday tradition where hubs will wakes up early and cook. And I can tell you this, he makes the best birthday fried noodles! Even Mom, the best chef in our family admitted, when it comes to fried noodles, Hubs' is better than hers. *wink*  
As for the birthday cake, for the last two birthdays, I have always been requested slices of Union cakes in different flavors instead of one whole cakes, simply because I adore almost all their cakes. 
 
So, bye bye lazy February. I'm ready on getting back my writing mood. :) Thanks for reading!

Ivy

The Fault in Our Stars

Picture credit: Google

A brilliant writer named John Green made "The fault in our stars" utterly popular. It's a title of a fiction book he wrote that becomes a best selling novel, so huge it eventually directed into a movie. 

I have read the book probably beginning of this year, but I haven't seen the movie until around half an hour ago. It's so late to even just watched the movie, I know, but I don't like sad endings, I remember I finished the book with puffy eyes, so I skipped the movie until just now when I got nothing to do and decided to have my afternoon passed over sad movie.

There's a saying from the leading guy, Augustus Walters,
"Apparently the world is not a wish granting factory".

Well it is one of the cold facts of life, but for a moment, let just make ourselves happy and think, what if the world is? What if the world is a wish granting factory? What wish will you be whispering for?

Mine would be and always will be... To be happy.

Coz in the end, it's all that matters.

Okay? Okay.


Ivy

Another Lately...

Finally had my laptop back from the repairing store after it got broken a while ago. Having to blog the several last posts from a phone has not been easy. It's late, between can't sleep and missing typing fingers on my laptop, I came to write this post as I don't have the mood to further write on food post at the moment.

It's an old topic inspired by one of the fashion blogger, Diana Rikasari, which I once posted two years ago. Anyway lately...

• Been thinking a lot on what plan God have for me in the future
• Stressing over house renovation
• Miss traveling (always!) 
• On a low carb diet
• Lovin' almost every songs from The Script
• Having too much thoughts on my mind it drives me crazy
• Been more into reading than writing
• Always having kiwi for breakfast
• Getting sick of the routine 
• Blaming society but realizing we are society
• Wish hubs would have more free time 
• Wishing hard for time to not fly so fast, so not ready for 2015 yet

XOXO,

Ivy

Let's vote! For a Better Indonesia

Hello there! =)

July, the election month is here and I'm taking this moment to leave foodie notes aside and share my thoughts on what's on my mind lately. I'm pretty sure many of you noticed on how different this year's presidential campaign. For months, news and social media are filled with updates on the issue.

I had the legal voting age over a decade, but never once I even care to vote. For any election day in Indonesia comes to me as no more than an excitement over a public holiday. Shame. But for so many years, I didn't see any hope how the country could move forward the massive corruption that's been around for so long. This round of presidential election is the first one when I really do care to use my vote. Why? Because I finally see hope for things might change, for somehow Indonesia could be a better country for our next generation. 

I see hope in that one person....

Since the start, I have known for sure which presidential candidate got my vote. I wouldn't be a hypocrite to say that I don't wish the others vote for the same number as mine, but I never once and never will force others or throw negative comments towards other team. For me, the presidential vote is the same as everyone's free choice to choose their religion. It's about someone's faith, someone's choice. If one person believe his/her choice is the best, even if it's against ours, who are we to judge? Or even worse, who are we to even force them to follow our choice. 

I wish people would be able to see the bigger picture, that in the end, all we want is someone who will lead Indonesia to be better, so whoever win the election, let it be accepted in peace and trusting him to do the job.

On the other hand, I honestly think if we want our country to change, we also need to change. Start with using our right to vote and respect everyone's choice without any negative action. Please don't let your vote abstain based on the thought of one vote doesn't really matter, cause it's wrong! Even a single vote could make a difference!

PLEASE USE YOUR VOTE ON JULY 9th. FOR THE SAKE OF OUR COUNTRY, FOR A BETTER INDONESIA.

Thank you so much!

*images taken from Google 

One Day Can Change Everything

I am actually debating with myself on whether or not to write this as it is a very personal thing and I always wanted the blog to be more about general sharing, besides of the food reviews. But there are many times when it just gets too heavy, and as hard as it is to explain, there's a part of me who wanted to include her in the blog.

Earlier last year, I lost one of my very best friend. It was shockingly. Even until this very day, everything still seems so surreal. Even until this very second, I still can't believe she's gone. 

I chose to not share on the how but I will always remember that morning, March 16th 2013, I woke up and as usual, grabbed my Blackberry to see any unread messages and I literally screamed when I opened the bbm from my bestie's little brother, "Ci, Ci F passed away" sent 04.23am. As I was dialing her brother's mobile, my mind was messed up, I remember a part of me was thinking that it was a stupid stupid joke my bestie did, that she somehow thinks it would be funny to prank me like this. The denial part of me kept thinking that way as I waited for her brother to pick up the phone, but as I heard Hello and the chronology shared, I fell into silence, slowly as my brain started to digest that it was not a prank, I started to cry. Hard. I was hysterical.

I remember how my phone beeping constantly, bbm, incoming calls, almost all our friends changed their bbm status to RIP, some even changed their profile pictures to her pic. I remember I chose to keep my phone away for few days. Seeing all those RIP status and her pictures every time I opened my bbm contacts was just... unbearable. For quite some time, everything just seem so fucked up. I really can't pull it off. Guilt, sad, sorry, angry, I couldn't understand why her life was that short.

We have been best friend for 17 years, since we were paired to sit together in class on junior high. We graduated high school together, enter the same college, took the same major and sat together in almost all classes. There was just too many memories. She was with me for almost two decades, hell she was my bridesmaid and a very very good friend, hilariously funny, the joker in our group and she was a loyal friend. I remember when I was hospitalized, she rushed to go see me the moment she heard and she can't even drive, so she took bus and the hospital was not even close to where she worked.

I have thought on pouring this in writing many times, to just let it out, hoping that somehow it will be lighter, but many times I simply can't. Like I said, there are times when it gets heavy, particularly this month. I just cannot believe it has been a year since she left.
Generally speaking, I am okay, I would like to believe she is in better place now. Though honestly, I think no one will ever be really okay after being left by someone they care about. There will always be that ache in your heart, which slowly with the time passes, the ache might faded, you might be no longer burst in tears every time you think of the late, but somehow you will always feel that the ache is still there. And by you, I mean me. 

It's scary to think what one day can do and how unpredictable life is.

Rest in peace, my partner in crime. You'll always be missed.

A New Year Note

Happy new year everyone!

Can you believe it's 2014 already? I know I have been saying this sentence way too much, but I couldn't help but to think on how time flies. Earlier today I just read about Suri Cruise, the oh so cute daughter of Tom Cruise & Katie Holmes, who just turned 7! Can you believe that she's 7 now? I swear it was just like yesterday when I saw Tom jumpin' on the couch at Oprah's showing how much he loves Katie and yet it was 8 years ago! Time really moves too fast.    

Anyway, a little note to start on my first post in 2014. I wish I could share on how blast I was last year, but my 2013 has not been that great. I feel I have wasted a whole year without making any big difference in my life. Sure, there are great blessings, but if I look back, last year just seems too... Vanilla. Plain without any toppings. It's not that I don't love vanilla, vanilla is good, way better than having rocky road, but you know, a bit of strawberry would be nicer.

To be completely honest, I feel like I have been too caught up with how I thought life's supposed to be and what the society expect, that I end up pleasing almost everyone but myself, prioritized people's need more than mine. What's forgotten by me is this saying, "In a world full of people expecting something from us, always remember the most important person to please is you". When I first heard the saying quite some time ago, it felt too egocentrism for me to understand, but lately it makes more sense to me.

So now, as much as I want life to stop moving so fast, I kinda glad welcoming the new year. It's not about "a new year, a new me" bulls***, but I'm glad how it waken me, resuscitate me to stop wasting my time and start focus on how I want my life to be. Just like Oprah said, Cheers to a new year and another chance for us to get it right. And I will get it right this time *finger crossed*.

Thank you so much for sticking with Ivy's Life and I really do wish all of you a wonderful year ahead! 

Cheers,

Ivy

Seven Deadly Sins in Beauty

**Alert: This is a non food post. Skip it if the only thing interest you in this world is food.**

Gosh... It feels like ages since the last time I wrote.

The feeling literally popped in the moment I type, so weird that I have to turn to the home page to see my last posting date... 16 days ago... It might not seem too long but personally for me, this is the longest time I didn't blog since Ivy's life's first entry around a year ago. It's funny as writing is sort of the thing I'm obsessed to. Something that always seemed to calm me down when I am feeling tense or simply have too much thought that I just need to let it out... in words. However, lately I haven't been doing such. 

These past recent days, I have not been productive. Lately still okay but around the first 5 days of last week, I literally almost didn't do anything. I didn't step outside the house even for once, I didn't cook, I didn't open my blog, I didn't tweet, I didn't even bother to look at any recent post in twitter, IG or FB, I simply almost didn't do anything with my life except... Blog walking! And no, not in food department. I haven't even read a single post from fellow foodies on my blog list which I normally always do.

It all started from a night cream...

I have my skin care routine but I used to never really give a thought on how important a night cream is until couple weeks ago, it strikes me that I am now in my late 20s and I should start doing some serious beauty investment for the sake of my now & then skin. You know those people who said "Age is just a number"? I never buy that. I mean, try stand in front of the mirror when you are 50, let's see if you still can say that age is just a number.
Anyway, a week ago I started to do some googling on which night cream worth to invest on, and from that simple search... I found way too much informative beauty treasures from all the beauty bloggers or vloggers around. And just like that, for the entire 5 days, I was hooked.

To make it short, One of so many things that caught my attention while I was browsing through You Tube was a beauty tag of seven deadly sins in beauty. I find it too cute to not participate on blogging it, so here it is... just for fun...

SEVEN DEADLY SINS OF BEAUTY

1. GREED

Q: What is your most inexpensive beauty product?

A: My eyebrow pencil. It's a cheap Korean brand, Etude. I think it's only around IDR 35,000++. Online price, don't buy at mall. 

Q: What is your most expensive beauty product?

A: A set of Kanebo Impress skincare.

2. WRATH 

Q: What beauty products do you have a love/hate relationship with?

A: Eye liner. I don't use make up a lot, but I love eye liner as my eyes are quite small so it's important for me to use eye liner. However, I hate it when it gets smudges after hours. I have tried many kinds of eye liners from Mac, Revlon, Bobby Brown which seems like every women's holy grail but didn't work for me, and right now am using Kanebo. I like the last one the most so far, but still it can't last all day. Anyone ever heard of Dolly wink liquid eyeliner? I think it's Korea or Japan brand. Recently I saw it was featured in a beauty magazine as one of the best of top 20 eyeliners. I ordered online and haven't received it. Finger crossed this one will be my personal fave.

3. GLUTTONY

Q: What is your most delicious beauty product?

A: It will be my sets of Bath & Body Works hand sanitizers. I love them! I have a draw full of them and still can't stop purchasing it whenever I saw those cutie came in new arrivals scent. It smells delicious with cute packaging.

4. SLOTH

Q: What beauty product do you neglect, due to your laziness?

A: Body lotion. Sometimes I am just to lazy or in too much hurry to apply the lotion. 

5. PRIDE

Q: What beauty product gives you the most confidence?

A: Perfume. I believe a good smell of scent can boost up the confidence.

6. LUST

Q: What attribute do you find the most attractive in the opposite sex?

A: A good sense of humor. I personally thinks a good sense of humor in a man is crucial. Especially if you're married, you know... living in the same roof, seeing him every single day, I think having a guy who can cracks you up everyday is one of the key to a happy non boring marriage life. ;)

7. ENVY

Q: What item would like most to receive as a gift?

A: Handbag. I love bags. I so wish that I can just point my finger to each of handbags that I like in the new Harper's Bazaar and it will magically show up in front of me. Dreaming, I know.

Lazy selfish 5 days of being away from all daily routines and just do what my heart wants to at that exact moment. 

Lately...

Inspired by Diana Rikasari's post, I end July by doing a post with same theme as her. ;)

So, lately...

• I've been addicted to traveling.
• Always have craving for naan bread.
• Getting bored of bubble tea. 
• Desperate to lose some weight but can't stop eating.
• Having a crush with Mr. Bruce Wayne.
• Learning that people do change. 
• Saving up to buy a new handbag. 
• Like to spend more time at home.
• Been feeling more blessed married to him.
• Miss to earn my own money.
• Having the worst mood swing.
• Enjoying watching Kimchi Chronicles.
• Had been watching rerun of Meteor Garden for the fourth time.
• Trying to accept that life has ups and downs. 

 So, what's up with you lately? 

Personal sharing: Journey

So, couple days ago my baby Lemon was participating in fashion bazaar held in my old campus. Of all the bazaars Lemon ever participated in, this was probably the one I most excited about. The thought of going back to a place with so many memories was sunk in my heart deeply and I hardly can't wait. You know sometimes, time flies so fast that it feels so good to bring back the old memories... Just to appreciate everything much more. And that's exactly what I did.

During three days of the bazaar event, I took some time walking around the campus. It had been years since I graduated, yet I feel the campus looks exactly the same when I say bye to it 7 years ago. Nothing much change though, college kids still hang out in the place my friends and I used to hang, favorite street hawkers were still there on the same spot, everything seems to be no different.

It might sound silly, but I really did enjoy my three days there. Driving through the street I used to cross every morning during college time, passing through the hang out spot, buying snacks from the same mini vendors, I even didn't pack my self a home made meal just because I wanted to eat the foods I used to eat there.

It's funny how life turns out. The fact that I studied accounting yet I suck at it and never interested in anything to do with numbers. And yes, sometimes I do think that if I can go back and change the past, I would prefer to take English literature as my subject in college. But to think again, to see and to actually live what life brought me today, nay.. I don't want to change a thing. I'm not saying that my life is perfect now, but it could be worse.

Those three days bazaar gave impact more than Lemon's income, personally it taught me a lesson I needed at the moment. Lately, I feel like I have been ungrateful and feeling down of things that I feel I haven't accomplished yet. Going back to my old campus had given me some sort of flashing back of how I used to be and how much I have accomplished since then.

I can't bring back the past. All I can do is moving on and make memories of hopefully a better future, so few years from now, I can look back and be thankful on how much I have accomplished then.

~It's never too late to be what you might have been~ George Elliot

Angel's Heart Campaign

I recently found out about a charity campaign formed by 3littleangels specializing in helping poor children improving their life quality.

I always respect people with big hearts who would do such positive blessing things. To support them, simply just donate 150k and you will get a t-shirt. Of course, the purpose was not the t-shirt, it was only meant as an appreciation for our kind donation in the spirit of helping poor and sick children. 

It was a very simple method to donate. You can go here or just text message like I did when I bought mine and Hubby's to +628388713858.

Let's do some sharing. :)

Make a Difference

Yesterday, I accompanied my mom for medical check up. While waiting, there's a picture framed in the wall which caught my eyes. I read the story written in the picture and somehow took me into a wiser perspective. I took my BB and wrote down the story to share in my blog. 

Hope we can have some learning point from the story... :)

There was a young man walking down a deserted beach just before dawn. In the distance he saw a frail old man. As he approached the old man, he saw him picking up stranded starfish and throwing them back to the sea. The young man gazed in wonder as the old man again threw the small starfish into the water. He asked old man, "Why do you spend so much energy doing what seems to be a waste of time?". The old man explained that the stranded starfish would die if left in the sun. "But there must be thousands of beaches and millions of starfish!" exclaimed the young man. "How can you make any difference?". The old man looked at the starfish in his hand as he threw it to the safety of sea, he said "It makes a difference to this one".

Welcome 2012!

The first day of a fresh new year!

Lemon's blazer, Mcqueen scarf, Longchamp bag, Marie Claire boots

I am one of those persons who like to set certain list of things I want to accomplish in the new year, no matter they all will be accomplished or not, but I just like to listed down all the things, making sure I have goals I need to work on.

Here are some of my list for this 2012: 

1. To genuinely be a better person 

2. A baby :)

3. A new house

4. Website for Lemon

5. To be a better home chef for my husband 

6. Australia trip

What's yours? ;)

Have a wonderful 2012!

Q's and Life

I was never that girl who wanted to get married in a young age. It's nothing against those who got married young, it's just not something that I want. On my second year of my relationship with my hubby (boyfriend, at that time), I remember my mom kept on pushing me to get married and I kept on telling her that it's not the time yet. It's not because I was having doubt, but more to the fact that I just don't wanna get married yet, I was not sure whether it had something to do with mom and dad pampered me too much that I was having a very good time on being single, or I was just one of those people who had these weird thoughts that wedding will just change everything.

On the third year of our relationship, he proposed. Of course, I said yes. Even though hesitation of having him to spend the rest of my life with never crossed my mind, still as I prepared my wedding, there was a slightly fear of how my life will be once I'm married. At that time, I was thinking how can I be someone's wife when at some point I am still childish, how marriage will change my life, will I still be having my own me time, and the biggest questions... will my marriage life be better than my single life? All those Q's... all those worries.    

And today, 20 - 11 - 2011, is our 1 year wedding anniversary. As I looked back who I was as a single woman, all those questions and worries I have back then, I realize all were just process. As much as I love him, as much as I have faith on having him as my husband, but still marriage life is a new life, something that was natural for a woman to have fear of before we experience it our self, when those WIFE title attached on us. At that time, by God's blessing, we know that we made a right decision. I know I am. I'm not here to say that I have a perfect marriage. I always think that the definition of perfect is different for everyone and if we want to compete with the actual definition of perfect, there will be no end to that, as someone will always have more than us, more money, bigger house, more family traveling time, and goes on. To me, I am satisfied by having a perfect marriage in my own definition. My husband makes me laugh and constantly do his best to make me happy, to me it's enough to be called perfect.

I am not someone who likes to make a big fuss on how stupidly in love I am, or how great is my partner is, believe me I'm just not. All those tweeting and status updates on FB and BBM to show the world how my feeling at the moment is simply just not me. I am quite secretive, but you know what... screw it... Today is my wedding anniversary and I've been having a blast, so I am going to say this: 

I love you dear, always have... always will. Happy 1 year anniversary!